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It’s been days since I heard from Cyrus. Days! Ever since we met online in that chatroom we never went longer than one day without talking to each in some way but now there’s complete radio silence. He’s not answering my calls, he’s not responding to my texts or to my emails. It’s like he’s really done with me.

1992

But I can’t accept that. We love each other! We just had a big fight, that’s all. There was nothing said that couldn’t be forgiven so why won’t he at least make an effort to communicate with me so we can resolve this issue quickly? I mean, we’re supposed to get married in three days and my groom won’t answer my calls. That can’t be good!

Oh Watcher! What if it’s really over between us? What am I going to do? How am I going to do this alone?

1993

When I fainted the night of our argument Gabe rushed to help me to bed. The next morning I woke up and rushed straight to the bathroom to empty my stomach into the bowl. It was while I was washing my hands then I realised what was wrong with me.

I was pregnant.

If it were any other time this would be great news. I’ve always wanted kids with Cyrus and not just because I’m the heiress of the legacy and I’m supposed to have kids but because I knew he would make a great Dad and I wanted my children to be fathered by him. After taking the pregnancy test and seeing the positive result, my first instinct was to call him and tell him the great news. But once again, he did not answer. Why was he doing this to me? To us?

“Hey, he still hasn’t returned your calls?” Izzy asked as I walked outside to get some fresh air. She was by the pool doing her usual laps before bed.

1994

“No.”

“I don’t understand him or his family. Mom did some horrible things – which I’m still mad at you for not telling me about in the first place – but her actions have nothing to do with you and for them to treat you like you’re responsible for the crappy things she did is insane!”

“They’re just angry. I can’t blame them for that.”

“But their anger is misplaced! You don’t deserve it. If I were you I’d start thinking about moving on. Cyrus obviously doesn’t have a backbone when it comes to his mother and you deserve way better than someone who ignores you like this after a fight.”

“I can’t move on. We have to make it work. Izzy…I’m pregnant.” I confessed.

“Oh my Watcher! Seriously? I thought you two were waiting until marriage?”

1995

“We were but…um…”

“Now that’s another thing I’m mad that you didn’t tell me about! Details later but right now, oh Ivy, come here!”

She pulled me into a hug and even though her body was wet because she just got out of the pool, I held onto her tight. She was mad at me but at least she was still here for me offering comfort which I really needed right now.

“Don’t worry. Everything will work out.”

1996

“But what if it doesn’t? What if he doesn’t want to be with me anymore?”

“Then he’s a stupid moron who doesn’t deserve you and you’ll just forget about him and focus on being a good mother to your baby. And plus you know Gabe and I and even Jo will help you so you’re not gonna be alone even if he’s not around. You’re my brave sister and you’ll survive this, trust me.”

“Thank you.” I really needed that pep talk. Being reminded that my family will stick by me even though Cyrus might not was comforting, even if it was for a little while.

1997

Because by the next day I was in full panic mode. Our wedding was two days away and I still had no idea if I should start cancelling all of the arrangements. The florist called twice and left a message to confirm the delivery location and I avoided getting back to them because I didn’t know what to say. I really wished Cyrus would talk to me so I can know my next move. I needed to know if I should keep on making plans for our future or if had to start making plans to cry in bed for the next couple of days.

Just when I was going to call him for the hundredth time, the front door opened and I saw him enter through it.

“Hey.” He said so simply, so casually, and with a smile on his face too.

1998

After I spent the last few nights crying myself to sleep because he wouldn’t answer the damn phone, after I had to go hide in the ladies room at work to splash my face with water so I wouldn’t hyperventilate after one of my co-workers asked about him, after this whole time worrying about him and worrying about the state of our relationship he just strolls in and says ‘hey’. I was livid! How could he be so cavalier? How could he be so normal when I was such a wreck?

“I’m so sorry, Ivy. I’ve been such an idiot.”

“Why were you ignoring me? I’ve been calling, and calling…”

1999

“I felt ashamed because how I behaved with you and I just couldn’t…I’m just really sorry I blew up on you like that. Look, if you’ll still have me, I want us to still get married like we planned.”

He still wanted to be with me! I felt relief for the first time in days. “But what about your mom and your sister? Are they still angry?”

“They are but…I don’t care. I love you Ivy and my feelings for you have never wavered. It was stupid of me to say the things I did the other night. I didn’t mean it and I want you to know that. You are important to me and I want to do right by you…and our baby.”

“What? How did you know that…?”

2000

“Isabel called me last night. After she cussed me out good and proper, she told me that you were pregnant.”

“I wanted to tell you myself, in person.”

“It’s good that she told me because it put things into perspective for me. I want a life and a family with you because you’re the most amazing person I know. You are sweet and funny and considerate, you’re nothing like your mother and I’m sorry for freaking out on you. Can you forgive me?”

“I already have.” I said.

2001

I probably should not have forgiven him so easily. He really hurt me by ignoring me for the last few days. A part of me even wondered if the only reason why he was standing there wanting to work things out was because he knew I was pregnant. I wanted to ask but I guess I was afraid of the answer. Izzy and Jo said we needed to take some more time to properly resolve our issues before we walk down the aisle but I disagreed.

Was it so wrong to want things to go back to normal?

2002

It’s not like our problems resulted from our relationship. It was because of stuff that happened in the past that we had no control over in the first place. Plus, I hated fighting with him. That was our first big fight and I hoped it would be our last. Now with that behind us, to me, there was nothing standing in the way of our bright future together.

2003

As Cyrus and I stood in front of our family – well, my family – and said our vows to each other I felt a sense of completion, like we had finally taken the next step towards our future. I wished his mother and sister were there to celebrate with us and it hurt a little to know that they were still holding a grudge towards me but I didn’t let that distract me from enjoying that moment in the chapel.

2004

I saw the way he looked into my eyes as he slipped the ring onto my finger. There was so much love for me. No one else has ever made me feel the way he has and I knew in my heart that no one else ever would. Cyrus was the one for me and he certainly made me feel like I was the one for him.

2005

Our first kiss as husband and wife was more special than any other kiss we shared. It was like the first kiss all over again. It’s funny too because our very first kiss took place at my sister’s wedding. Now we’re at ours and I hope this all isn’t one big dream that I’m going to wake up from because if it is a dream, I’d rather stay asleep forever – as cheesy as that sounds!

2006

The reception took place in the basement of the chapel which was used for events. All of the guests were having a great time especially when Isabel and Gabriel performed together. Isabel was not the best singer but her deliberate off-key wailing to a love song was hilarious! Cyrus nearly fell off his chair laughing.

2007

The food was good but the cake wasn’t all that great. Maybe I should have followed Jo’s advice and gone with the baker she recommended. I didn’t think it was that bad honestly. Sure, the icing was way too sweet and the cake was dry but it was still edible. Besides no one remembers a wedding because of the cake, do they?

2008

Cyrus didn’t think it was that bad either. We both happily shared the first slice of the cake as Izzy watched on.

2009

All in all the day went really well. There were no hiccups whatsoever and no surprises. That was until Abbie and Blair walked in. I honestly didn’t think they would show. I was the first one to see Abbie as she came down the stairs. The scowl on her face made me worried she was about to make a scene.

2010

I thought she was gonna start yelling, like at Cyrus for marrying me or maybe blame me again because of what Mum did to her husband.

But instead, she walked up to Cyrus and gave him a hug. I could tell Cyrus was happy that they changed their minds about coming. Even though they missed the ceremony I was glad they didn’t miss the rest of the day.

2011

“Thank you for coming.” I said to her and Blair as I sat down by their table. “It means a lot to the both of us that you two came.”

“Well I wasn’t gonna miss the opportunity to see my little brother in tux,” Blair joked. “You look really pretty Ivy. I like your dress.”

“Thanks. It wasn’t the dress I bought originally but I’ve gained some unexpected weight since then and now that dress doesn’t fit me anymore. This one was kinda last minute.”

2012

“Oh yeah, I heard. Congrats by the way.” She said to me with a warm smile, but then I saw her glance in her mother’s direction and the smile faded. “I’m gonna get a drink by the bar.” She said as she quickly excused herself. Abbie and I sat there in silence.

After a while, I decided to break the ice. “Abbie, I know you are still angry but I just want you to know that I love Cyrus with all of my heart and I’ll never do anything to hurt him. I really want us to get along like we did before. We are family now, after all.”

“Yes, we are. You certainly made sure of that, didn’t you?”

2013

She smiled but I soon realised that her smile was just for show. “What do you mean by that?”

“The only reason why I allowed him to marry you is because you’re pregnant. I’m not about to let my son abandon his own child or the mother of his child even if I don’t approve of her. In our family, family comes first and I guess you knew that which is why you trapped him.”

 “I….I didn’t…how could you say that?” Trapped him? I couldn’t believe what she was implying! “I did not trap him. We slept together because we wanted to. Because we love each other. And I didn’t intend to get pregnant either! It just happened!”

2014

She snorted in derision. “I’m no fool. I know you manipulated him so you could bind yourself to him. As soon as he found out you were pregnant he forgot everything but I haven’t. Just know that your marriage changes nothing for me. You’re the mother of my grandchild and that’s it. Don’t expect anything more than that.”

Her words cut like a knife. I just sat there helplessly feeling like I was just run over by a car. She practically hated me. She thought I trapped her son. That I manipulated him? I didn’t manipulate him! I didn’t get pregnant on purpose and the accusation that I did really hurt me. But was she right about one thing? Did Cyrus decide to marry only because I was now pregnant? It was something I just thought about but now I’m beginning to wonder if it’s true.

I felt sick. The morning sickness decided to kick in even though it was the middle of the afternoon. This was supposed to be the happiest day of my life but now… I just feel like crap.

2015

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